BEDA Day 28: I am in like with my own fictional character and so are you

You know that phenomenon that takes place when you find someone that you sort of kind of like (but maybe do not really know all that much) and then you project all of your ideas and desire for affection onto them? Like with celebrities and the like? I think it is just an intriguing but incredibly annoying event. When you know that this person is not somebody who should be in your head all the time. Talking, altering your behaviors, affecting your decisions. It makes me feel weird. I feel like I went without this "voice" in my head for at least a year or so..but maybe I am wrong. Maybe we always have it. Maybe I just replaced it with like fictional characters or celebrities or whoever between the times when it has been real people. I dunno...do you have a voice in YOUR head? I wonder if there was every a time when I truly did not. You know...I really really think there was. Must have been. I remember it actually...I think. And it was the best. It is that "after break up" feeling when you learn to be yourself again. i wonder if after that wears off I am ever truly me... I want to be who I am, because of me, because of what I like. And I want these nobodies--who should not even really matter to me because I am just imagining them differently than they actually are--out of my head...

Makes me think of the whole Edward Cullen phenomenon. People love him so much BECAUSE they know so little about it. They can project whatever they want onto him. That is what makes him such a genius character (yeah. I said it. Stephanie Meyer did something genius. Was it a conscious decision or just something that occurred naturally because that is how we are.), because it takes the place of that desire to believe something perfect exists. He is a blank canvas for anybody to project any ideals and desires onto.

I dunno. Anyway. Voice in the head? Person who will not get out of your thoughts? Do you have one? Do you want it gone? I want it gone. I want this person who is more imagination that reality to disappear. But to be fair. I can reasonably say that it is not really that person who is in my mind. Maybe I can change the person's name and a few other things and just turn him into a fictional character and then it will not count as that person anymore. Maybe I could make a story out of him. Haha. Strategies to get people out of your head: Turn them into fictional characters and forget the real person you hardly know.

Anyway. Did that make sense? Prolly not. Can this also be considered No Edits in August? NEA? Haha. Or No Proofreading in August: NPRA (XD NPR).

Also. Update on the birthday situation. Remember that Harry Potter Exhibit job I mentioned? My interview/audition is at 1pm on my birthday. What does that mean? It means prolly no going out the night before. As for the day of...I guess my dad got me a ticket to see Creedence Clearwater Revival on the 3rd in Wyoming. So it seems as though I will spend my big day getting ready for an interview and then driving to Wyoming the rest of the night so as to be in Wyoming in time for the concert. i like to travel so I suppose that is okay. I will listen to an audio book or something. As for the internet party...I guess I still wanna do it, but I just need to figure out when it will not be awkward to do it, as I will be at my parents' house Sept 3-15...hmmm....anyway. End

Night.