Thundercats Are No

It's one twenty-six in the am and here I am sitting on top of my empty desk with nothing but a Hogwarts snuggie, bag of pretzels, pillow, backpack full of slightly less soggy school work and the Severus Snape shirt on my back (also pants).

The status quo has changed.

I realized that I left my guitar in my room, which the humidifier people had made me believe would reach microwave status. Dehumidification and microwave temperatures are no place for a guitar. So I went back to rescue it. And shit my fiddle would you believe it!? My posters were all pretending to be kites!! So I stationed myself atop the only occupiable surface left in my room and decided to keep watch.

To be honest it isn't so bad. Much better than a public place. Not terribly hot. And the deafening fan noises are quite soothing in their own way. ...remind me of the ones my dad used to use on dry wall.

Anyway, the point is: A captain always goes down with his ship, pretzels, pillow, snuggie, schoolwork and Severus Snape shirt...

PS. If I'm not beef jerky by the end of this, none of us are.

Sara has no friends.

It's midnight o'two and here I am, the only customer in a late night coffee shop, wearing a t-shirt with Severus Snape's face on it, snow boots with no socks, an Eskimo looking coat, and a back pack harboring a pair of pajama pants, some texts books, and several odds and ends still soaked through from the flood.

And when I say flood, what I really mean is...flood.

The hot water heater at my house got tired of being a hot water heater and started leaking water all over the basement. My room is, apparently, the lowest place in the house. Guess where all that water pooled?

Yep, my room.

So I cleaned up my room--because there was no way I was letting people into my room to fix shit in the state is was in--, and when I finally got around to calling the landlord we were at critical floodage: meaning a bit of a puddle of water was making it's home upon my carpet.

The story goes on, but where it ends is here, alone in this coffee shop, while men, who watched me cry as I dismantled my room, are currently at my house, running some equipment that will be dehumidifying and anti-molding my room for the next 4-5 days.

The point of the story is, if my house were on fire and I only had three minutes, I would grab my soggy school work, my Eskimo costume, and the Snape shirt on my back.

But no socks. Those always take far too long to find.

2011 New Year's Resolution: Take 2!

Remember that blog I posted not even an hour ago? I take it all back. Don't get me wrong, I still want all those things, but what I really want this year is to notice every day go by. I want to be able to look back next year and think, "On this day last year...". I want every day to mean something, to be significant, and I want to feel alive on every single one of 2011's 365 days.

That is all I want: life.

So forget 2010 and let's embark on a year we will remember.

Less than 3,

Sara

PS. In the last hour, this happened: New Years Resolutions - Alex Carpenter

PPS. I also want to say the word "love" at least once every single day this year. :)

PPPS. New blog!! Love Everyday in 2011

It's 2011 now, so I am somehow obliged to do this...

New Year's Resolutions, of course.

#1: Keep my New Year's Resolutions

Because I never manage...

#2: Blog and vlog at least once a week, ...each?

Because I don't do it regularly enough...

#3: Go to the gym regularly

Because every NYR list must have this on it..., and it makes me happy

#4: Finish off college with a bang

When it's finished, I want to feel like I've given 100% to my last 2 quarters of school...

#5: Dedicate more time to being creative

It makes me happy, and I just don't do it enough

#6: Procrastinate less!

I want to have more time to do things I want to do, by being more productive 24/7

#7: Get a job!

Need I say more?

#10: Be more musical

One of the creative things I feel like I dedicate less time than I once did/ought to

#11: Be happy

Hmmm...that's all for now. 11 seems appropriate for 2011, eh? I think these are all quite related. I need to spend more time doing things that I really, really want to do and less time avoiding doing things that I'm not so inspired by so as to make more time for the former. (This is now a circle. :P) I once read that Virgos have a tendancy to loose inspiration for stuff if they don't do it right away, so I need to start doing things as soon as I feel inspired for them or learn to extend the inspiration.

At this exact moment 1 year ago, I was driving through Wyoming on my way to Seattle. I moved exactly one year ago, and it hasn't been nearly what I was hoping for. In fact, I've spent most of my time there quite depressed. I am at home in Wyoming right now, and I think I'm finding that, what I was looking for up there in WA was perhaps what was right here in front of me all along. I have often said that the best days of my life were the last 4 months of 2009, when I was living on my own here in Riverton. I think it is time to analyze why that was and consider revisiting my life then, because I've had enough of being unhappy. Time to take control of my life, to follow my heart for once.

On the other hand, I feel like going back to WY would be a bit of a "stuck in the past" situation, might keep me from growing as a person and achieving all the things that I want to achieve. Might be a form of "dwelling on dreams" and "forgetting to live". But perhaps it was that kind of thinking that got me into this situation to begin with... I'm just tired of missing people. Find me a place where everyone I love is all around me, all the time. Please, thank you.

Love,

SARA J.